Grandma, Why You Do Me Like That?

Dan Bull - Grandma, Why You Do Me Like That?

I've been described as quite a nice chap

Why you might ask, pfft, I dunno, I'm just like that

But my mind's tapped like hi-hats on my tracks

Can't bypass the deep stuff much, I need a hi-pass

So I can glide fast right past

Strife like I was covered in butter, smothered the stuff on my back

I'd just like to lie back and have a nightcap

But there's black bags under my eyes, I want an ice pack

When I'm low on melatonin, then I'm throwing my nap

Time out the window when I try pulling the blind back

Sun is shining, and we're finding that's an anticlimax

Sadly, life's lacking passion, I don't even mind that

I maybe will just give up on my damn self

I find it fine, gravy, chilling at my nan's house

Dine inside daily, living off her handouts

But now that nice lady's kicked me out the dang house!

Grandma, why you do me like that?

I was your manchild, and you threw me right out

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Why you do me like that?

I'm the talk of the town

The way I wobble around

They are knocking my style

And it's knocking me down

Grandma, why you do me like that? Wow

I can't believe my nan kicked me with a roundhouse

Hit me in the kidneys 'till I'm crouching in the outhouse

Now I've got to worry about wealth and how to get it

Make myself a living, make myself self-sufficient

It's selfish, isn't it? Now I'll have to sell fish and shift shellfish

Fresh off the shelf in shifts for chefs for shelter

Fretting 'cause I'm fresh out of vouchers

For freeloading, now I'm Al Fresco, I've felt it

Felt tip crayons on my curriculum vitae

Can't erase or fix it with an instant replay

Life's definitely too hard every day

Like zip-a-dee-doo-dah-zippedy-ay

But whatever, give me a suit, tie and briefcase

I'm ready to do time in meatspace

And though I know that I'm probably throwing a wobbly

Over not growing up properly, tell it to me straight, mate, don't put it softly

Grandma, why you do me like that?

I was your manchild, and you threw me right out

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Why you do me like that?

I'm the talk of the town

The way I wobble around

They are knocking my style

And it's knocking me down

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Well, let me explain, lots of people are wobbling

It's not something to be bothering ya

Life can seem impossible

Every time we dream we drop it all

Can't sit on the lawn for long

We've got to be responsible

Get comfy being uncomfortable

With something we've not done before

I can't put on the confidence

Without keeping a confidant

Walk up the street with your pyjamas on

See your badonkadonk

You could be an even more clumsy humpty dumpty

Someone'll still see you all hunky for the rumpy-pumpy

You shouldn't be grumpy just because your custard gon' be lumpy

You're receiving something sweet while some people be hungry

So step up, and then step outside

'Cause what you put in's what you get out of life

It's a wild ride, won't get out alive

But while we're 'round might as well check out the vibes

You're the talk of the town

The way you wobble around

They might be knocking your style

But they're not knocking you out

Grandma, why you do me like that?

I was your manchild, and you threw me right out

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Why you do me like that?

I'm the talk of the town

The way I wobble around

They are knocking my style

And it's knocking me down

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Look, you may stumble, so it tends to pay to stay humble

So when you take tumbles, then you say: "I'm all good"

Transmit your power like a freakin' fan belt would

I phrase it in ways that only Dan Bull could

Bathe in self praise 'till I am well scrubbed

Come out smelling like sandalwood

'Cause we're all winners here, so I hand out dubs

Feel a teeny bit proud? Well, damn, you damn well should

I know I said stay humble, but you stand out good

I smell you moving louder through the crowd than Gandalf's bud

Through Merry, Pippin, Frodo and Samwise's hood

You're feeling sweet as when you eat a piece of Grandma's fudge

But don't look for food to come to you, you're not a fly trap

It's not a box of chocolates, life's a spice rack

And when it bites you in the act, you've got to bite back

Or you'll find that it'll treat you like a light snack

When you hit skid row, go follow the tire tracks

Fight back, smash life like glass

Then when they inquire why you're such a nice chap

You can reply: "Pfft, I dunno, I'm just like that"

Grandma, why you do me like that?

I was your manchild, and you threw me right out

Grandma, why you do me like that?

Why you do me like that?

I'm the talk of the town

The way I wobble around

They are knocking my style

And it's knocking me down