Talkin' John Birch Paranoid Blues (Live) Lyrics
Well
I was feelin' sad and feelin' blue
I didn't know what in the world I wus gonna do
Them communists they wus comin' around
They wus in the air
They wus on the ground
They wouldn't gimme no peace
So I run down most hurriedly
And joined up with the john birch society
I got me a secret membership card
And started off a walkin' down the road
Yee hoo
I'm a real john bircher now
Look out you commies
Now we all agree with hitler's views
Although he killed six million jews
It don't matter too much that he was a fascist
At least you can't say he was a communist
That's to say like if you got a cold you take a shot of malaria
Well
I wus lookin' everywhere for them gol darned reds
I got up in the mornin' 'n' looked under my bed
Looked in the sink
Behind the door
Looked in the glove compartment of my car
Couldn't find 'em
I wus lookin' high an' low for them reds everywhere
I wus lookin' in the sink an' underneath the chair
I looked way up my chimney hole
I even looked deep down inside my toilet bowl
They got away
Well
I wus sittin' home alone an' started to sweat
Figured they wus in my t
V
Set
Peeked behind the picture frame
Got a shock from my feet
Hittin' right up in the brain
Them reds caused it
I know they did
Them hard core ones
Well
I quit my job so I could work all alone
Then I changed my name to sherlock holmes
Followed some clues from my detective bag
And discovered they wus red stripes on the american flag
That ol' betsy ross
Well
I investigated all the books in the library
Ninety percent of 'em gotta be burned away
I investigated all the people that I knowed
Ninety eight percent of them gotta go
The other two percent are fellow birchers
Just like me
Now eisenhower
He's a russian spy
Lincoln
Jefferson and that roosevelt guy
To my knowledge there's just one man
That's really a true american:george lincoln rockwell
I know for a fact he hates commies cus he picketed the movie exodus
Well
I fin'ly started thinkin' straight
When I run outa things to investigate
Couldn't imagine doin' anything else
So now I'm sittin' home investigatin' myself
Hope I don't find out anything
Hmm
Great god