Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers (Explicit)

Eastern Philosophers vs Western Philosophers (Explicit) - Epic Rap Battles of History

Lyrics by：Nice Peter/EpicLLOYD/Destorm Power/Timothy Delaghetto/MC Jin/KRNFX/Peter Shukoff/Lloyd Ahlquist/Mike Betette/Dante Cimadamore/Timothy DeLaGhetto

Composed by：Destorm Power/MC Jin/KRNFX/Peter Shukoff/Lloyd Ahlquist/Mike Betette/Dante Cimadamore/Timothy DeLaGhetto

Epic rap battles of history

Lao tzu sun tzu and confucius

Versus

Nietzsche socrates and voltaire

Begin

I'm coming off the acropolis to start some pandemonium

Don't bring limp raps to a pimp slap symposium

The mad gadfly philosophy was my invention

Rolling with the flyest nihilist

And me their french henchman

We got the wisdom

And the wit

That even I couldn't question

Dropping western medicine

On these east infections

It's evident

You've never been

Our type of mental brethren

We're better

Thinkers

Better speakers

Better lovers

Better men

This type of arrogance is sure to be expected

From men who speak of wisdom with no clue

Of what respect is

You westerners are sloppy needing discipline in life

You lack control of yourselves and of the mic

While we use precise strikes

To disrupt your concentration

Hand you an ass-whipping our descendants

Will honor for generations

We filled a nation

With patience

And the presence

For living

And you'll never hold a candle

To the wisdom we've written

Oh I'll give you something

You can bow and kow-tow to

When I squat down and squeeze

Out a tao of pooh on lao tzu

You need to take control of the life you're given

They call me übermensch 'cause I'm so driven

And I'm a freethinker

So confronting conformists like you it's my job

Got a sharp wit

Like a spit that'll skewer you like

A confu-shish-kebab oh

You flubbed the mission

I'm beating your submissive a*s into submission

Dishing out more disses than letters and

Pamphlets and plays I've been publishing

Now that we've covered the two yin and

Yang twins

I can move onto jackie chan

Sun tzu I'll be picking apart

Your wu with my method man

This seminal general isn't so tough on the mic

All your men must be like yo what happened

You're pitiful lyrically

Lucky for history you didn't

Author the art of rapping

***** I wrote the art of war

So you better get your guns out

These white boys getting burned

'Cause guess what

Now the sun's out

Asians spitting sick but no this isn't sars

Laozi kick the beat now confucius drop some bars

Let me be candide with you voltaire

French drip with the egg noodle hair

Your ego's just so distracting

Free speech doesn't mean just keep yapping

And you killed God so I gotta ask

Did he die of shame when he made your moustache

You try to plan a new german psyche

But you just grew hate me no third reichy

And it all starts with you

You're the father socrates

Honestly I think you owe both of your students

Here an apology

I wouldn't exactly call myself

A student of this plebe

Don't make nietzsche come over

And put a knee up in your chi

'Cause I'm N-I-E-T-Z-S-C-H-E

And I'll end any ************

Like my name in a spelling bee

Plebe ***** I'm toxic like a hemlock sip

Hang a sandal on the door

'Cause you can suck soc's ****

Sacrebleu socrates you're making things a little tense

Come let's blind these chinese hinies

With some shiny bright enlightenment

I'll not be taught camaraderie

From a frog who rigged the lottery

You make a mockery of ethics

So keep your fat nose in your coffee

Let me be frank don't start beef with the frank

Who hangs with b franks giving ladies beef franks

I have turned them on themselves

Their chaos is our opportunity

You must remember a bowl is most

Useful when it is empty

Ugh laozi I don't mean no disrespect

But you need to fill your bowl

With some **** that makes some sense

Oh you don't want to stand in the path

Of lao tzu today

I'll make you move ***** get out the way

Yo where in the tradition of rap battles is it written

That two dudes on the same team

Should squabble like some clucking chickens

Man confucius you always trying

To put something in it's place

Why don't you tell your eyebrows

They need to fit better on your face

Okay I see you wanna make it like that

I'll smack that warmongering head out

Of your to-go box hat

So here's the real golden rule

I'm way above you weak rookies

Confucius say

You can all hold these fortune cookies

What is winning

Who is next

You decide

Epic

Quiet

Rap battles of history