Lovesick Diagnostician (Fake Album Version)

Lovesick Diagnostician - Ben Folds

Dr. Yang help me mend this broken heart

You got to help me doc I don't know where to start

When she walked right out that door

And left me crying on the floor

She says she's only going to the store

Dr. Yang what's the lovesick diagnosis

'Cause she says she cannot cope with my neurosis

You would think I had chronic halitosis

Dr. Yang

Dr. Yang now her voicemail box is full

If she won't call me I'm feeling like a fool

The last time I saw her in her car

I threw her sh*t out in the yard

Locked her out and headed to the bar

Dr. Yang what's the lovesick diagnosis?

'Cause she says she cannot cope with my neurosis

I could always hurt myself doctor she knows this

Dr. Yang Dr. Yang

All the king's horses

And all the king's men

Couldn't get back my girlfriend

Dr. Yang if you can't fix my heart in the end

Actually there is something you could do instead

Call my girlfriend from your number

Explain that you're a doctor

Tell her that I love her so

She hurt me more than she could know

And even with all your degrees

There's nothing you can do for me

Then she won't have to block my number any more

Dr. Yang Dr. Yang

Dr. Yang gonna kill myself tonight

Tell her that Dr. Yang