Crazy Rap

(Wait a minute' man. Hey' check this out' tell it. It was this blind man' right?

You were this blind man' right?

He was feelin' his way down the street

With this stick' right?

Hey. He walked past this fish market'

You know what I'm sayin'?

He stopped' he took a deep breath' he said'

Woooooo' good morning' ladies.

You like that sh*t' man? Hey' man'

I got a gang of that sh*t' man.

I tell you what my man on the guitar'

Fool on the drums'

Everybody just crowd around the mic'

I'll tell you all these mutha-f**kin' jokes.

But first' I'ma start it off like this.

Hey' help me sing it' homeboy.)

Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need.

We can go to the park after dark'

Smoke that tumbleweed.

And as the m*******a burns we can take our

Turns' singing them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech

And Chong' sell tapes from here to Hong Kong.

So roll' roll' roll my joint. Pick out the seeds and stems.

Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale'

Skatin' on Dayton rims.

So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville.

Can I come to you

If my tapes and my cds just don't sell'

I bet my caddy will.

Well it was just sundown in a small white town.

They call it Eastside Palmdale.

When the Afroman walked through the

White land' houses went up for sale.

Well' I was standin' on the corner sellin' rap cds

When I met a little girl named Jan.

I let her ride in my Caddy cause I didn't know

Her daddy was the leader of the Klu Klux Klan.

We f**ked on the bed' f**ked on the flo'' f**ked

So long' I grew a f**kin' afro.

Then I f**ked to the left' f**ked to the right.

She sucked my dick 'til the sh*t turned white.

I thought to myself' Sheba' Sheba! Got my a**

Lookin' like a ZEBRA!

I pulled on my clothes and I was on my way'

Until her daddy pulled up in a Chevrolet.

I ran. I jumped out the back window'

But her daddy' he was with waitin' a 2 x 4.

Oh' he beat me to the left' he beat me to the right.

The mutha-f**ker whooped my a** all night.

But I ain't mad at her prejudiced dad' that's

The best damn p**sy I ever had.

I got a bag of w**d and a bottle of wine.

I'm a f**k that b**ch just one more time.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need.

We can go to the park after dark' smoke

That tumbleweed.

And as the m*******a burns we can take

Our turns' singing them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong'

Sell tapes from here to Hong Kong.

So roll' roll' roll my joint.

Pick out the seeds and stems.

Feelin' high as hell flyin' through

Palmdale' skatin' on Dayton rims.

So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville.

If my tapes and my cds just don't sell'

I bet my caddy will.

I met this lady in Hollywood.

She had green hair'

But damn she looked good.

I took her to my house' cause she was fine'

But she whipped out a dick

That was bigger than mine.

I met this lady from Japan'

Never made love with an African.

I f**ked her once' I f**ked her twice.

I ate that p**sy like shrimp fried rice.

Don't be amazed at the stories I tell ya.

I met a woman in the heart of Australia.

Had a big butt and big titties' too'

So I hopped in her a** like a kangaroo.

See' I met this woman from Hawaii.

Stuck it in her a**'

And she said' Aiiiiieeee!

Lips was breakfast' p**sy was lunch' then

Her titties busted open with Hawaiian Punch.

Met Colonel Sander's wife in the state of Kentucky.

She said' I'll fry some chicken if you just f**k me.

I came in her mouth. It was a crisis.

I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need.

We can go to the park after dark' smoke

That tumbleweed.

And as the m*******a burns we can take

Our turns' singing them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong'

Sell tapes from here to Hong Kong.

I met Dolly Parton in Tennessee.

Her titties were filled

With Hennesy.

That country music nearly drove me crazy'

But I rode that a** and said' Yes' Miss Daisy!

Met this lady in Oklahoma;

Put that p**sy in a coma.

Met this lady in Michigan;

I can't wait 'til I f**k

That b**ch again.

Met a real black girl in South Carolina;

F**ked her 'til

She turned into a white albino.

F**ked this hooker in Iowa.

I f**ked her on credit' so I owe her.

F**ked this girl' down in Georgia; came in her mouth.

Man' I thought I told ya.

Met this beautiful sexy ho; she just ran

Cross the border of Mexico.

Fine young thing' said her name's Maria.

I wrapped her up just like a Hot Tortilla.

I wanna get married' but I can't afford it.

I know I'm a cry when she gets deported.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need.

We can go to the park after dark'

Smoke that tumbleweed.

And as the m*******a burns

We can take our turns'

Singing them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong'

Sell tapes from here to Hong Kong.

So roll' roll' roll my joint. Pick out

The seeds and stems.

Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale'

Skatin' on Dayton rims.

So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville.

If my tapes and my cds just don't sell'

I bet my caddy will.

Crazy Rap - The Hit Co.