The Walloping Window Blind

The Walloping Window Blind - Natalie Merchant

A capital ship for an ocean trip

Was "The Walloping Window Blind;"

No gale that blew dismayed her crew

Or troubled the captain's mind

The man at the wheel was taught to feel

Contempt for the wildest blow

And it often appeared when the weather had cleared

That he'd been in his bunk below

The boatswain's mate was very sedate

Yet fond of amusement too;

And he played hop-scotch with the starboard watch

While the captain tickled the crew

And the gunner we had was apparently mad

For he sat on the after-rail

And fired salutes with the captain's boots

In the teeth of the booming gale

The captain sat in a commodore's hat

And dined in a royal way

On toasted pigs and pickles and figs

And gummery bread each day

But the rest of us ate from an odious plate;

For the food that was given the crew

Was a number of tons of hot-cross buns

Chopped up with sugar and glue

And we all felt ill as mariners will

On a diet that's cheap and rude;

And the deck shook when we dipped the cook

In a tub of his gluesome food

Then nautical pride we laid aside

And we cast the vessel ashore

On the Gulliby Isles where the Poohpooh smiles

And the Anagazanders roar

Composed of sand was that favored land

And trimmed with cinnamon straws;

And pink and blue was the pleasing hue

Of the Tickletoeteaser's claws

And we sat on the edge of a sandy ledge

And shot at the whistling bee;

And the Binnacle-bats wore water-proof hats

As they danced in the sounding sea

On rubagub bark from dawn to dark

We fed till we all had grown

Uncommonly shrunk when a Chinese junk

Came by from the torriby zone

She was stubby and square but we didn't much care

And we cheerily put to sea;

And we left the crew of the junk to chew

The bark of the rubagub tree