MILK (Explicit)

I ain't the same n***a that I once was

I lost my f**king mind and then I fell in love

I did a bunch of d**gs because I couldn't sleep

I lost a couple months

I chipped my f**king teeth

And there's a couple women

And they know some things

About lies that I done told and s**t that I done said

And n***as that I robbed

So I'm real paranoid

I have voices in my head

Hi

My name is merlyn

I just applied for food stamps

I just moved to california

With my boy band

Dropped out of a good school

Hippies in my commune

I left 'fore the rent was due

Used to want a briefcase

And a short commute

Used to wanna sell coke

And whip an audi coupe crazy if I did that

Wouldn't be talking to you

Walking through the pit falls

Of a college student

Crazy how you get them letters

And that make you feel accepted 'til you walking 'round the campus and you the only african

Nobody with passion just cats that take direction well

Take acid trips to find themselves

Well

I gotta get better at being me

Being who I am

I gotta get better at everything

Being who I am

I just want a friend that I can hang out with

Being who I am

Someone I can sit around

Lay on my couch with

Being who I am

Ever since I moved out I've been broke

Ever since I grew up I've been ugly

Ooh

And I need get me some dollar

Dollar

Dollar bills y'all

Ever since I left my momma house I've been mad as hell at the world

Sometimes you don't gotta rhyme when you feel it

Sometimes I barely ever feel a f**king thing

Sometimes I wish that my f**king phone would f**king ring

And go off

And wake a n***a up

I'm used to being sad

And I'm used to being down

I'm used to being used

I miss my boy being around

I gotta get better at being me

Being who I am

I gotta get better at everything

Being who I am

I just want a friend that I can hang out with

Being who I am

Someone I can sit around

Lay on my couch with

Being who I am

Droppin' all I got on this one day

I just wanna be somebody someday

Droppin' all I got on this one way

I just wanna be somebody someday

Droppin' all I got on this one day

I just wanna be somebody someday

Droppin' all I got on this one way

I just wanna be somebody someday

I gotta get better at being me

Being who I am

I gotta get better at everything

Being who I am

I just want a friend that I can hang out with

Being who I am

Someone I can sit around

Lay on my couch with

Being who I am

I'm trying to look for motivation of smaller things

But baby steps to my atonement when I foster dreams

I've been told I'm too transparent with my thoughts sometimes

So I wrote songs until they pass

And I can fall in line

I fell apart the moment that you thought you found yourself

'Cause I knew at that point I couldn't be in the equation anymore

But moving on with open

Broken hearts

Will show you everything you need to see about yourself to start moving forward

So many things I wanna say that I'm not sure need to be known but everybody swears they f**king know me

So why

Don't I lay every card I'm holding on the table

At that point I wonder what they'd show me

I almost lost my father

Still surreal for me to think about

Considering how many of my friends have lost theirs

I never know if what I'm saying is the right thing

If not

I'm ready more than ever for the crosshairs

It's all fair when it's not you

Some people have angels

What if only shadows follow you

And all the ghosts inside that seem to hollow you

The branches of the weeping willow start to swallow you

And then you realize you're exactly where you're supposed to be

The horizon clears

You wipe the tears

And all the skeletons are ready for your story