In Old Mexico

Composed by：Lehrer

Now I'm sure you're all aware that this week is national gall-bladder week

So as sort of an educational feature at this point I thought I would acquaint you with some of the results of my rece

Searches into the career of the late doctor samuel gall inventor of the gall-bladder

Which certainly ranks as one of the more important technological advances since the invention of the joy-bu

And the dribble-glass

Doctor gall's faith in his invention was so dramatically vindicated last year as you no doubt recall when for the first time in history in a nation-wide poll the gall

Er was voted among the top ten organs

His educational career began interestingly enough in agricultural school where he majored in animal husbandry until they caught him at it one day

Whereupon he switched to the field of medicine in which field he also won renown as the inventor of gargling

Which prior to that time had been practiced only furtively by a remote tribe in the

Who passed the secret down from father to son as part of their oral tradition

He soon became a specialist specializing in diseases of the rich

He was therefore able to retire at an early age

The land we all dream about sunny mexico of course

The last part of which is completely irrelevant as with the whole thing I guess except it's a rather sneaky way of getting into this next

Of popular song which is one of those things about that magic and romantic land south of the border

When it's fiesta time in guadalajara

Then I long to be back once again

In old mexico

Where we lived for today

Never giving a thought to tomara

To the strumming of guitars

In a hundred grubby bars

I would whisper te amo

The mariachis would serenade

And they would not shut up till they were paid

We ate we drank and we were merry

And we got typhoid and dysentery

But best of all we went to the plaza de toros

Now whenever I start feeling morose

I revive by recalling that scene

And names like belmonte dominguin and manolete

If I live to a hundred and eighty

I shall never forget what they mean

For there is surely nothing more beautiful in this

World than the sight of a lone man facing singlehandedly

A half a ton of angry pot roast

Out came the matador

Who must have been potted or

Slightly insane but who looked rather bored

Then the picadors of course

Each one on his horse

I shouted ole ev'ry time one was gored

I cheered at the bandilleros' display

As they stuck the bull in their own clever way

For I hadn't had so much fun since the day

My brother's dog rover

Got run over

Rover was killed by a pontiac

And it was done with

Such grace and artistry that the witnesses awarded the

Driver both ears and the tail -but I digress

The moment had come

I swallowed my gum

We knew there'd be blood on the sand pretty soon

The crowd held its breath

Hoping that death

Would brighten an otherwise dull afternoon

At last the matador did what we wanted him to

He raised his sword and his aim was true

In that moment of truth I suddenly knew

That someone had stolen my wallet

Now it's fiesta time in akron ohio

But it's back to old guadalajara I'm longing to go

Far away from the strikes of the a f

Of l

And c i o

How I wish I could get back

To the land of the wetback

And forget the alamo

In old mexico

Ole